The Great Affair is to Move

“What made you decide to move to Cambodia?” Hannah asked me over lunch today. And that made me realize that I’ve been giving everyone who asked the most generic of answers: “Why not? It’s a beautiful country, the people are wonderful,” I would often say. It’s been a year since my big move and I think it’s only fitting I talk about my reason for moving.

It’s still quite surreal to me to be living in Cambodia and be able to do what I love. Looking back at the past year when I first came to the Kingdom of Wonder, I was a tourist for three months and finally decided to buckle down and stay for good. I learned so much since then - about myself, about life, and what it’s like to be truly on your own.

Travelling isn’t just about being able to go places, meeting people, and experiencing a different culture, as cliché as it may sound, it’s a road to self-discovery and personal growth. Before I left the Philippines, I was the trust fund girl. I didn’t have to work a day in my life. Household chores were always done by somebody else, public transportation was improbable, and I have always been known as somebody’s daughter first and third, or maybe even fourth, as a photographer.

I was spoiled, yes, but my parents always taught me the importance of being able to stand alone and work hard for what I want in life. So I was on a mission to educate myself. The harsh reality of life is no stranger to me. Being a daughter of a photojournalist, I was exposed to death, corruption, and lies at a very young age, but always seeing it through glass. And now I’m living it.

Cook, sweep, mop, launder, and repeat - that’s my mantra when I’m not out taking photos and writing stories. I walk or take moto-taxis to get to where I want to be (my parents will have my head for this). And although I miss the comforts of home, life and personal growth is all about tough love. I may not have the luxuries I’m used to, nor do I have the money to splurge on anything, but I am hungry to learn more, explore more, and consequently grow more.

I am a misanthrope, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. It’s what drives me to take photos of the not so beautiful and share them for the world to see. Humankind has committed quite a number of atrocities, life isn’t fair - and I want to create awareness and spark change in my own little way; that’s why I do what I do.

02/07/14

I could do without tan on my left ring finger where my hand meets my knuckles.

My heart bursts with gratitude realising just how blessed I am with people who love us. To family and friends who have been nothing but supportive to both Taylor and I, thank you, from every fiber of our beings!

And of course I would like to thank our sponsors who made this all possible:

Paopao Sanchez for the photography

Alexa Luna for the styling

Phoebe Ouano of Phoebe's Cupcakery

Lea Ann of CMYK Dessert House

Back to Basics

I haven't done documentaries in quite some time, I haven't travelled to a new place in a month as well, come to think of it, I haven't been doing the things I love lately.

There's always a thin line when it comes to doing what you love because it makes you happy and doing what you love for the money. Most people would probably think that it's great to be able to do the things you're passionate about and get paid for it-- but when your craft becomes a money making venture, you can sometimes lose the essence of why you do it in the first place. It becomes less fun and more frustrating. And for any creative person, that's when shit hits the fan.

Others are lucky, though, they are able to distinguish that fine line. I still have to practice my practice, and remember, always, to do the things I am passionate about for myself and not for anyone else.

Photo Diary: Holidate

Let me tell you this: I am exhausted, but the exhaustion is worth it. I am so happy at a base level that I don't understand that it's possible to have anything more than a base level of happiness.

I am home alone as I type away. The clicking of the keyboard turns into a rhythm as the words flow. Click, click, click away. S. and I went to the riverside today. It is Constitution Day in Cambodia, and I couldn't be any happier to spend the day snapping away and book hunting.

Abdicate, v.

Three years, the length of time I stopped cutting my hair. Although I would tell people I just wanted to wear it long, it wasn't the case.

Three years, the length of time I tried to preserve a memory. But now it was getting too heavy, weighing me down like an iron ball to my ankle, instead of being a crown of glory on my head. I did not stop to realize that it was a memory I did not need.

Three minutes, the length of time it took for me to cut my hair. I was free, and now it's time to make new memories to keep-- and this time, in timelessness.

I've been losing quite a lot of things lately, important things, things I know I might never get back. Photography has always been a great reprieve whenever I feel sullen. These photos were taken at Wat Botum Park; I was there for the Izzi sampling. It was a breath of fresh air seeing quite a number of families and parents bringing their children to play in the park. You don't get to see much of that in the Philippines. Kids these days are often cooped up in their rooms playing video games or hanging out in malls with their friends.

More photos after the jump...